Tough Love

I serioulsy love this post. Parenting isn’t easy, special needs or not. It takes work to not be a “because I said so” parent (this answer should only be given maybe 5% of the time). It takes work to TEACH a child how the world works, to help it make sense to them. It’s tough to put someone else’s needs above your own. It’s tough to take time to understand why they’re hurting when they don’t have the language to explain it. THAT is tough love.

Raising Mama

“Tough love,” says the mother as she forces her child to the busy street corner with a sign declaring his sins to the world.

“Tough love,” nods the father as he blasts his daughter’s laptop into pieces and posts the video online.

“Tough love,” applauds the Internet commenters, when a photo of a note goes viral, a note that says “You came home past your curfew, so you can sleep on the porch. You’re lucky I gave you a pillow this time.”

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This post is very important for every parent of an autistic child to read, especially parents of non-speaking children. And I wish Autism Speaks would think about this when they put together their fearmongering videos with parents saying they feel like killing themselves and/or thier children IN FRONT OF THEIR CHILDREN.

Into The Woods: Children will Listen (lyrics)

Careful the things you say, Children will listen;

Careful the things you do. Children will see and learn;

Children may not obey, but children will listen;

Children will look to you for which way to turn;

To learn what to be.

Careful before you say “Listen to me”, Children will listen;

Careful the wish you make, Wishes are children;

Careful the path they take, Wishes come true, not free;

Careful the spell you cast, Not just on children;

Sometimes a spell may last, Past what you can see

And turn against you. Careful the tale you tell;

That is the spell. Children will listen.

Emma's Hope Book

In Emma’s RPM session yesterday with B. on the topic of discrimination, Emma wrote, “Autism voices have been silent.” (Emma initially typed “silenct and then she edited that to “silent”.)   B. encouraged her to write more, asking her what she suggested.  Emma wrote, “take time to try and learn from us instead of staring at us like we are garbage.”

When she wrote the word “garbage” I felt sick to my stomach. This, from my twelve-year-old daughter.

I remember when my father would call me into his home office to scold me for my latest infraction.  I remember the shame I felt.  I still remember the tingling feeling of rebellion mixed with self-doubt when I noticed the disapproving stare of a stranger upon seeing my outfit – a crop top and pair of cut-offs that I’d smuggled into my backpack to wear to go shopping with a friend after school…

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Travel, Friendship and Sensory Overload

Two rebloggs in one day. I know. But this post struck a nerve (pun intended) re. sensory awareness and NT’s being sensitive to it. My son is a seeker, so as far as I can tell, it takes a lot of input to make him overloaded. He stims when we travel by plane (but who wouldn’t!). There are people out there, autistics we know and love, who deal with the pressure of sensory issues CONSTANTLY. If we who do NOT deal with it can understand just a small piece of the strain this causes, we can help the world be a better place – for them AND for us.

Emma's Hope Book

A couple of days ago my friend Ib, of the blog Tiny Grace Notes, whom I was staying with, drove me to the airport.  Ib knows me pretty well and could tell I was nervous, as I have become increasingly as I get older, about getting to the airport, going through security and making my flight, even though we were leaving ample time to do all of that.  Still the combination of nerves due to traveling, my busy work schedule, being away from my family for so long, being tired and going to an unfamiliar airport had me on high alert.

It was snowing a little so we needed to have the window wipers on or Ib wouldn’t be able to see well enough to drive safely.  But the wipers made a scraping noise that I found almost intolerable.  Every time the wipers ran across the window they vibrated…

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