LOVE, NOT FEAR

So long in coming. So glad it did.

Aspie Minister

This posting is part of the Flashblog presented by “Boycott Autism Speaks.”

LOVE; NOT FEAR

Feb. 14, 2014

 Five Months; nine days; and counting.

 September 5, 2013.  The day I got my diagnosis of Asperger’s.  I had been suspecting it for a while, of course, and had seen a neuropsychologist for testing.  At 66 years old, I had been shocked to start figuring out I was an Aspie.   I wasn’t sure how the official diagnosis would feel.

 On Sept. 5th, I went to the office of the neuro-psychologist to get my diagnosis.  When she said, “You definitely have Asperger’s,” a weight was lifted from my shoulders.  66 years of weight.

 I thought, “Oh, my God – that explains EVERYTHING about me that I didn’t understand.  EVERYTHING.”

 In these five plus month, the weights have continued to fall off.

 I no longer go through my day in fear, thinking…

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Wandering

Wandering

This has never been a challenge in our lives, but I’ve heard of it, and read the tragic stories in the news. How hard it is to balance safety with self-reliance; understanding that there’s a desire we aren’t aware of or don’t recognize, but that is clear to the person who “wanders”; to not take away anything to ensure safety, but to find safe ways to make more possible. 

The “other” kind of expert

The “other” kind of expert

“From the parenting perspective, I fail to understand how anyone would not benefit from a little ‘insider’ knowledge on what their child might be living.  After all, many of them are living similar things.”

– Who could ask for a better resource than those who HAVE and ARE living as autistic in a neurotypical world – who share their neurology with our children? We neurotypical parents can only guess – autistic adults KNOW.

Are you a bully in sheep’s clothing?

Are you a bully in sheep’s clothing?

Not sure how to use trigger warnings – but silencing/othering/condescension are part of the post this is linked to.

As a neurotypical parent of an autistic child, when I read this post the first time, it wore me out. I honestly do not understand the need for NON-autistic people, often autism-parents (like myself) to correct AUTISTIC people regarding how they refer to themselves. It boggles my mind. If autism parents can’t step back and listen/respect OTHER autistic adults, how in the world are they ever going to learn to listen/respect their own children?

Autistic children do not remain stagnant. Autistic children grow up to be autistic adults.  You can’t predict the future of a toddler/pre-schooler, typical or autistic. Who in the world would have predicted that Temple Grandin would have a B.A. (Psychology, Franklin Pierce College), an M.S. (Animal Science, Arizona State University), and a Ph.D. (Animal Science, University of Illinois) when they had met her as a NON-speaking 4 year old?

Alone v. Lonely

Alone v. Lonely – “I’ve always enjoyed being alone. My two autistic kids feel the same. And I never thought much about it until I was older and it was brought to my attention by  non-autistic people.” S.R. Salas

This link connects to a post that speaks specifically to how shifting perspective just a little can change the world a lot. very important when autism is present in our lives. Would be nice if this were part of everyone’s world-view 🙂

daddy love – it’s in the script

An absolutely lovely post, and so much progress made 🙂
My son doesn’t script. He has favorite songs, etc., but he has “typical” verbal communication abilities. If your child DOES script, please read Diary’s posts related to this. Scripting is often communication (from everything I’ve read by parents and autistic adults). Stopping scripting stops a potential avenue for communication – our most desired and NEEDED thing in our relationships.