Silence I: Frustration

This is a MUST read, especially for the NT’s out there who want to have some understanding of the communication challenges their autistic friends/family face. And read the COMMENTS too – so much to learn!

Musings of an Aspie

The first in a 3-part series on silence. 

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My silence is frustrating. For me. For others.

I don’t mean the silence between the words, the comfortable kind, the long drive in the car, relaxed lunch in the park, playing video games for hours side-by-side on the couch, reading together kind of silence.

Frustrating silence is the kind that arises in place of words, filling up all the space where the words should be. It starts with a heaviness in my chest, like my breastbone has become a plate of armor thick enough to stop a lance or a bullet or a barrage of charged emotions.

The weight holds the words down, tethered tight, floating out of reach. I can see them, hear them. Inside me, there is a cacophony of noise as the words rattle and clash, struggling to escape. It feels as if I’m shouting and yet there…

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